You, my friends are cordially invited to the First Annual Sunny California VIRTUAL CBG & Roots Music Fest
(Note: as used here, virtual means IMAGINARY).
This is a potluck meal, so please bring a covered dish. If you can, bring a signature dish from your region, such as fried okra from the American south, tortillas from Mexico, sweet corn from Iowa, Fish and Chips from the U.K. and Vegamite sandwiches from Australia.
Please RSVP and tell us what vehicle you will be driving and what snacks you are bringing. Air Force One takes up a lot of space. There will be limited parking for air craft. There is plenty of boat and submarine parking, but it is first come first serve. We have room for over 100 buses. We've been told to expect busses from Canada, Mexico, Australia, Holland and the U.K. We hope the U.K. folks will drive at least one of those double decker busses.
Activities include: continuous open mike in several different areas. Vendors. Submarine races. Disc Golf Tournament. Largest and smallest fish contest at the fishing event . Nude beach. Regular beach. Disco. The grand opening of the west coast branch of Uncle John's Pawn shop (free corn dogs to the first 500). Ugly dog contest at 4 pm. Goat Rope Rodeo at 5 pm. And MANY MORE.
Please RSVP. ASAP. WTF.
Uncle, there I was minding my own business, and floating in on the tide was your message in a bottle......well that Mexican police photo. I thought it might have been a P.O.W. Photo from the Korean War! Saying you look confused and wasted is a compliment!
Yo, Richard. Throw one of those jockstraps over the fence to me. I was restin' up on the nekkid beach, gatherin' strength for the goat rodeo and jam session to follow. I fell asleep and some sumbitch stole my clothes! A jockstrap won't be pretty, but I think it'll get me to the Goodwill or Walmart for some duds. In fact, it'll be Walmart fer sure. Seems that an old guy in a jock won't be out of place or even raise any eyebrows. Please hurry, it's startin' to get a little cooler. I'll be waitin' by the peephole!
Rick to the rescue Grandpa! These athletic cups are going fast. Luck is on your side, one left! I seen a very ugly dog dragging some polyester cutoffs around, don’t know if those were yours. You might show up at the ugly dog contest. I’m on my way, I’ll give you a lift to Walmart, but don’t expect me to go in with you!
Thanks for the assist Richard. Just my luck the only jock you had left was the elephant model. Who the hell donated that !? Glad for you that you had a towel for me to sit on going over to Walmart! Just so there is no confusion, the photo Richard included was NOT me. You're welcome. He graciously offered to photograph me in an attempt to humiliate me in front of this august body of builders. I was going along with it, but there was some thought to the possible legal ramifications of posting elder un-porn, or displaying a public nuisance, Ultimately, good common decency prevailed. Again, this is a pro model pic, included to illuminate the assistance I received. BTW, if anyone picked up some dog-bit camo shorts, give me a shout.
Richard, hope I didn’t offend you or anyone else! I did get carried away and over the top! Your posts were entertaining and humorous, a great addition to the virtual festival idea! I might of crossed the line for some folks and I apologize.
Sorry, man. Just point that balloon toward the rising sun. You'll be home in time for the superbowl.
Hey everyone I was one of the designated picture takers. As I was riding home on the train my camera and all my memory cards flew out the window and ran over by the caboose. Darn. I need a favor......I know there was hundreds of you all at this years virtual event. PLEASE dress back up in your beach gear and your favorite git. Send a pic to Richard Sundberg, UJ , or myself. I know there were others who were taking pictures too, I will get ahold of them. Come on let's make the most memorable festival yet. And thanks